Christmas season impacts us all in different ways. Most of us have the ability to control our attitude. We have a choice to make between being happy like Buddy from Elf or grumpy like the Grinch (see last week’s blog). However, recently I started thinking about the ones who don’t really have a choice and can’t quite control how the holiday season affects them. You and I may experience stress and slight anxiety due to shopping, hosting family gatherings and the hectic schedules that come from this season. Being joyful during all the festivities makes a difference despite the occasional headache and traffic we have to tolerate. But what about the ones who are feeling blue when everyone else around them is feeling red and green?
Many individuals have unwelcomed guests such as loneliness, depression, anxiety, and even blues from the loss of a loved one. My mother-in-law lost her battle to cancer three years ago and this was her favorite time of the year. Facing Christmas without her is challenging and painful especially for my husband. People without a significant other, or those who live far away from family experience loneliness which leads to them isolating themselves, riding the storm “season” until it’s over. Others who struggle with anxiety and depression are challenged even more. Facing the crowds or attending functions forces a nonexistent smile.
If you or someone you know experiences any of these during the holiday season, know that you are not alone! There are different ways to combat these feelings to ease up your pain during this time of the year and maybe always.
- Don’t hunker down! If you want to stay in and curl up on the couch, get dressed and go for a walk. Go sit at a nearby coffee shop. Call a friend and go to the movies. These are small steps that don’t require too much socialization but they also get you out of the house.
- Missing someone who’s no longer around? That’s okay!! No one expects you to forget them. Focus on the good memories you shared. Maybe, develop a tradition that would honor them. In my family’s case, my mother-in-law bought my girls Disney’s Frozen ornaments so we decided to add a Frozen themed tree to our decorations and we call it the “Nana Jean” tree. This puts a smile on our faces, especially my husband’s.
- Find new ways to keep yourself occupied; attend those crazy and loud family gatherings even if you don’t want to. Your smile may not be fully genuine but at least you are there, surrounded by others.
Believe me when I say, this is not easy by any means. How do I know this? I suffered from PTSD (more on this in a future post), depression, and anxiety. I have braved endless therapy but I have also made a conscious decision to combat all of it. Take control of this season before it takes control of you.
